Monday's Suck - Liberty Lose

Lindsay Whalen. Ass-Kicker. Basketball Goddess. Sex Symbol. And Dream Crusher.

Sun 67, Liberty 61

Yeah, the Liberty are 10-14, nine games out, and last in the division. We're now behind everyone in the division except Washington (tied), and Chicago, in possession of the last playoff spot, is two wins and a full game ahead. This sucks balls.

Donkey Balls, in fact.

Once again, the Liberty were outplaying their opponent and gave the game away. leading going into the 4th quarter, the Liberty stopped coming up big in situations and lost their sense of urgency. What's the spell, kids?

L-O-S-S.

The beginning of the game should have spelled it out for us. The Sun win the toss, and then it goes into a "Who can miss the most shots" contest. Sun? Miss. Liberty? Miss. Sun? Miss. Liberty? Miss. It goes on like this for two and a half minutes until finally Loree Moore comes up with it and sinks a huge basket.

An omen, portending of things to come.

Katie Douglas sparks the Sun, however, and they roar back 8-3. Dutch isn't doing much, but McCarville, Thor, Thorn, and Moore manage to push the Liberty to a tied game after ten minutes. 13-13? It could have been MUCH worse.

Like this much worse.

The Liberty seem to have found their angle, however. They romp, storm and kick their way back into the game, with a hearty two baskets from the Middle-Man at the beginning of the 2nd Quarter to start them off.

Oh, Middle-Man. I've missed you.

McCarville keeps up her monster game, racking up point after point. Katie Douglas (CON) is sick, too, racking up 16 points in the first half alone. It seems that whenever she gets the ball, the defense just opens up for her. Moore is doing well, too. And Thorn? Well, you know what she is in everyone's side.

"A stitch?"

Katie Douglas goes down hard near the end of the half, but luckily, the MSG video-guy cuts to the Fat Guy dancing, and when all is said and done, Douglas is back out onto the court. The buzzer rings, and the Liberty are ahead by 5 going into the locker room. I wish I could give you more, but there was an incident involving mustard on my shirt that required two minutes of attention near the end of the half.

The Tide Pen = Greatest Invention in the 21st Century.

That would be the end of my jollies, however, for while Douglas would only score five more points in the game, the rest of the Sun would step up and force the Liberty to protect their lead, something they were unwilling to do.

"So the Sun are leading. Big deal. It's just a game, man."

Instead, turnover led to missed shot led to easy rebound led to poor defense. And, much like many of the games early on in the season, it seemed that the Liberty spread like a certain body of water in the middle-east whenever a certain Sun player got the ball.

That's right. They picked up Moses on waivers.

Still, the Liberty are ahead at the beginning of the third quarter, but we just aren't getting things done. Down from shooting 50% at the beginning of the game, the Libs seem to shoot nothing but awkward shots from weird angles, begging the Sun, who weren't exactly doing well themselves (38% from the field, 26.7% from beyond the arc), to just put them out of their misery.

The Sun never had a problem when Old Yeller had to be shot.

They came into the fourth quarter with their streak on the line and left it, twenty-two points later, intact. Marvel, Thor, and Marlowe did their best, but couldn't pull enough rabbits out of their ass to save this one.

No, I'm not going to go the full nine with this pic.

Instead, the Libs seemed listless. They didn't push the ball and just kinda laid back on their heels, content to lose the game. I won't name names, but there was a certain person that wasn't having any kind of night out on the courts who should have been pulled by Patty near the end of the first half.

My impersonation of Dutch.

The 4th quarter winds down, and with 20 seconds left, the Liberty suddenly realize that if they lose, they'll be four games under .500.

Too late, gals.

And that's it. It's foul, foul shot, crazy shot goes off, Sun Rebound, repeat madness, and then the seconds tick off the clock. And that's the game.

An interesting promotion; these were handed out to the first five hundred fans to leave last night.

The Sun came to play, and even though they messed up some huge opportunities in the first half, they never gave up. I can't hate a team from Connecticut...

That's where my beloved Whalers came from...

...and so, I must give credit where credit is due. Props to Patty for being more lenient with playing time, but a definite wag of the finger for keeping in Kraayeveld despite the fact that she was playing on Venus.

Known alternately as the Love Planet and the Suck Planet.

Dutch? I love you, and so I shall forgive you this game. But next time? Point out the scoreboard to Patty and give up your spot to someone who's "On" that night.

GAME NOTES

• Janel McCarville = 18 points. Loree Moore = 9 rebounds.
• Cathrine Kraayeveld. 25+ minutes on the court. Zero points, four shots, three rebounds, and two turnovers. Wow.
• Connecticut has now won eight of their last ten and are only two games behind the free-falling Fever.
• Refs? Not exactly on tonight, but the Liberty didn't do themselves any favors.
• Patty still not understanding the idea that if it IS broke, DO fix it.
• Decent crowd, mostly thanks to the massive contingent of Sun fans in attendance.

Next Game? Los Angeles, this Tuesday.

730, Tuesday
MSG
One Last Gasp

I will almost definitely be in attendance. I hate L.A., rehearsal for my sketch comedy group might be cancelled, and Martina Weber was dressed today. She's gonna get gametime in the near future, and I NEED to be there for that.

The Writer's Girlfriend would be jealous, but she says even baser things about Daniel Craig.

Look for the tall gentleman who looks like he just came from work... because he will have.

AROUND THE LEAGUE...

FRIDAY'S GAMES

Houston 69, San Antonio 63
Minnesota 85, Los Angeles 76
Phoenix 98, Chicago 96
Seattle 89, Indiana 75

SATURDAY'S GAMES

Detroit 76, Washington 64

SUNDAY'S GAMES

Detroit 75, Los Angeles 73
Chicago 88, Houston 70
Phoenix 80, Indiana 75
Minnesota 78, Sacramento 73
Silver Stars 92, Storm 88

I'm happy about the Houston game, frankly. I don't mind San Antonio, but I like the grit that Houston is showing. They started off incredibly weakly but have rebounded to show their true potential. Would that the Libs could do something similar...

Yeah, that encapsulates my emotions right about now.

Minnesota beating Los Angeles? Okay, I was overly sarcastic with this game, but I thought that L.A. had a much better team than people were giving them credit for. It wasn't the first time I was way, way wrong.

Just ask the Writer's Girlfriend.

Chicago pulled very closely with Phoenix and gave them a run for their money. In the end, however, the Mercury pulled together and headed the Sky off at the pass. It was a strong game, marked by a complete absence of dignity, defense, and sobriety.

Like my family reunion!

Indiana continues their Catchings-less spiral. If the Liberty had managed to play like the team they are capable of being, they would be able to catch up. It looks like it is Connecticut's division now, as Indiana just refused to show any semblence of a heartbeat against the Storm.

It's like 24, except not so "laugh-out-loud" ridiculous.

The Mystics suck. Detroit rules.

I concur.

Anything else to add? No? Next.

Detroit wins back to back games and cements their lead in the East. Los Angeles, like always, makes a run of it but can't seem to push themselves over the edge. Interesting to see Detroit right its ship AFTER Cheryl Ford gets injured for the season. That's the sign of quality, right there: lose a player and still manage to come together.

Chicago destroyed Houston. Eighteen point win? Did the Comets even show up after a certain point?

Dutch and the Comets were hanging out at McSorley's last night, got trashed, and forgot to show up to their respective games.

That puts Chicago even further ahead of us than they already were. Great. Wonderful. And nice to see two burgeoning superstars on their team play like they want it.

Ass.

Oh, Indiana, where art thou? Whence hast thou gone now that thy captain, thy leader, thy shining force, hath been injured most seriously? How willst thou compete? How willst thou survive? White (25 pts), Whitmore (11), and Sutton-Brown (14) canst not carry thee for ever. That Mercurial team from Phoenix did best you, verily, with Pondexter (21 points) and Smith (18 pts, 12 rbnds) leading the charge, and methinks that thou shouldst thank whatever god smiles favorably upon thine sullen scalp for the numerous wins that thou didst miserly stockpile early in the summer months. For these, it shall be known, will be what carries thee into the August play-offs, and not thy current game.

Thank you, thank you. Try the meatloaf special.

This is what I hate about predicting scores in the WNBA. Minnesota is the worst team in the league, and yet once in a while, they'll all get together and decide "Hey! We're getting paid to do this! Let's put some backbone into this, yeah?" Almost as if, late last night, Augustus sat everybody down at Denny's and conspired to steal a game from the Monarchs.

"Okay, let's play defense tonight. I'll score 39 points. And everybody? Hit those shots."

The Silver Stars showed why they are the best team in the West by taking down a ferocious Storm. Seattle wasn't going to just hand this game over, and they fought tooth-and-nail from the start. San Antonio pulled it off, however, thanks to stellar play from Marie Ferdinand-Harris (5 rbnds, 14 points) and Becky Hammon (30 points).

"Hey, New York? How do you spell MVP? Oh, wait. Nevermind."

No games today. A zillion tomorrow.

Patty has some words about last night's game. She blames the team's youth and inexperience. Well, there's enough of this shit sandwich for everyone.

Nice piece on Lauren Jackson from ESPN. It goes into her various woes and tribulations, and indeed it must suck balls with those weak shins, but she is a superstar, hometown hero for Australia, a big reason why the Storm might stay even if the Sonics go, and getting paid one of the largest salaries in the WNBA (along with the cash she makes in the winter). She'll be made if she can just hold on.

A big reason for Holdsclaw's sudden retirement was depression, according to Forbes. You know, the condition she's faced her entire life.

Solid reporting. What color will the sky be tomorrow?

Liberty Belle up in the afternoon. Have a good Monday, if you can. And see the Simpsons Movie. As someone who grew up on the show and is disappointed in where it has headed, it is a breath of fresh air. 9th Season caliber. Until later, then...

See ya, Space Cowboy...