Tuesday Update - Hell's Belles (Did I do this joke before?)

It's go time...

GAME PREVIEW

Washington Mystics
Tonight, 7:30
Madison Square Garden

The Mystics messed with our minds last time around, using their devilry, witchcraft, and necromancy to make the Libs stumble out of the gate and have to fight back all the way.

Too bad they didn’t look into their crystal ball…

The Liberty canned them, 81-76, although the game could have easily slid the other way had the Liberty not awoken and beat the Mystics like they were the Buffalo Bills.

Diagnosed as the Chockus Majorus Complex.

Since then, the Liberty have gone 3-2 (three straight wins, then two losses), while the Mystics have lost four straight to drop to 0-7.

That’s what you get for playing with Satan!

The Mystics have some good players on their team (Alana Beard chief among them), and they could give the Liberty a run for their money if the Belles can’t raise their heads and remind themselves that the only two games they lost were at the hands of the two best teams in the league.

Pick up the pieces and stab someone with ‘em

I will give the Mystics one thing, though: their website is hands-down cleaner, crisper, and more reliable than the Liberty’s. Major props.

AROUND THE LEAGUE…

Chamique Holdsclaw announced her retirement. Holdsclaw was one of the Old Guard, a fierce competitor who averaged over 17 points, 8 rebounds, and 34 minutes of play a game. She’s also apparently only the fifth woman in NCAA history to score over 3,000 points. Read the article for the full feature. She will be missed.

Holdsclaw politely declined Deification, much to the dismay of women’s hoops fans around the world.

Monarchs 82, Comets 67

(My pick: Monarchs)

Someone’s got to fill me in here, as I am new to the whole WNBA thing. Is it always like this, where, really late in the season, there are this many inept teams that just seem to keep losing? I honestly thought the Comets had the talent to bring it together for this game, but the Monarchs threw ‘em to the Dogs.

Cruel, Sacramento. Very cruel.

Today’s Game

Seattle Storm @ Chicago Sky

Again, like a Kansas song.

This album has been known to literally disintegrate clothes off of women

The Storm (3-3) are a decent team this year, one that is going to be on the brink come August. The Sky (4-4) are still struggling to keep their heads above water. The Storm have the benefit of coming off a strong win against Minnesota (is their any other kind against the Lynx?), while the Sky have won three of their last four. I am going to bring shame to my family by saying this, but I think the Sky have it here. Sky by 5.

Power Rankings are up on ESPN. The Libs remain at number 3, behind the Fever and Shock, of course. The writer makes a good point: the Liberty have only lost two, and in the grand scheme of things, that’s not major.

Some more haters here and here. One is a bit older, but it’s still the same basic argument; women can’t play ball the same way men can, they’re ugly, lesbians, blah blah blah. Way to make a point and shore up the testosterone quota.

In the essence of fairness, and so that nobody out there thinks that they’re alone, I’ve also found some people who like the WNBA, here and here. To be fair, one of them is written for the NBA’s official sites, but it’s still good to see some back-up out there. I will reiterate my old call for haters, but this time for those who like the WNBA. Find a link? Send it in.

“I think anybody would say that they're a surprise to be 5-0. But if you watch them play, they play really hard. They're riding an emotional wave, which will carry you a long way. It's unclear if they can sustain that level, but we'll see when we play them."

- Detroit Shock Coach Bill Laimbeer prior to his team's game against the then-undefeated Liberty, to the Detroit Free Press

Next match-up’s on July 6th, in Detroit. Let’s shove some crow down this moron’s throat.

All right, lads and lasses, I’m out. Have a good day. Nickname up by four.

See ya, Space Cowboy…